Why are Christians so homophobic? Here's one answer, well worth hearing:
The speaker gives excellent advice to church members facing this problem. But I think his answer to the question is wrong!
To summarize his answer: (please allow me to use “gays” as short-hand for the whole GBLT thing, for readability)
1 - many Christians are not just phobic of gays – they hate them!
2 - this is because they don't understand gays
3 - it's also because gays make them uncomfortable
4 - having a religion which says God is on their side lets Christians be even nastier to gays
IMHO this is wrong (if we're speaking of Christians, not drunken steelworkers in dark alleys). Here's my argument.
1: yes, we have hatred, not phobia. But we don't hate gays! We hate straights who love the IDEA of gays (and lesbians etc).
Here's a proof: Christians are apoplectic about “gay marriage” laws. But these laws are not made by gays! They're made by “sympathetic” (perhaps deluded) straights, in our governments, representing the majority of voters, who are also straights. Sexually straight, but desperately wanting to favour homosexuals. I shall call this “homophilia” - an irrational love of homosexuality.
Another proof: Christians are furious about churches which ordain gays. But these church policies are made by the majority of the synod/presbytery/whatever – who are straights!
Another: Bruxy mentions the CEO of World Vision, who was viciously attacked for agreeing to hire “married” gays. But the CEO is a straight!
Think about it. Across the world Christians are NOT sending hate messages to gays. They're sending them to politicians, school boards, organizations, churches, who are mostly straights. WE DON'T HATE GAYS. We do hate homophiles.
2: It's true, many Christians know very little about gays, and are uncomfortable talking to them
Guess what? We also know very little about handicapped people, people dying of cancer, newly bereaved people ... and are equally uncomfortable with them. But that doesn't make us hate them. It just makes us tongue-tied and awkward, until we get to know them. Many of us eventually acquire good friends who are gay, or bereaved, or whatever.
3: Another thing which stokes up hatred by Christians is the untruths, the falsehoods propagated by these “sympathetic” straights. We hate lies!
A few examples:
- gays can't help it, have no control whatever over their behaviour.
That's a lie. We can't help our likes and dislikes, but we can choose what we do. By nature I am a polygamist, and I'm very tempted – but I don't have to act that way.
- gays are just the same as straights in all other respects.
That's a lie, at least for male gays. If you survey the scientific literature, you find that MSMs on average have higher rates of infidelity, broken relationships, alcoholism, drug addiction, and other problems. Half of MSMs also have a sexual girlfriend. There may be good reasons for all that. But they're not the same.
- gays stay together just as long as straights in marriage.
Again a lie for male gays. Surveys show on average they change partners way more often.
- God approves of love, so how could He oppose the love of a same-sex couple?
A clever lie. God DOESN'T oppose love between men, be they brothers, father-son, or friends. He does oppose them having sex together.
An even BIGGER thing that infuriates Christians is our “cultural allergy”, the PC knee-jerk intolerance of any criticism. If we say anything against Israel, we are anti-semitic. Say anything against gays and we are homophobic. Which means an irrational fear of homosexuals – so our opinion is immediately dismissed as irrational, before we are even heard!
4: Our religion does increase Christians' hatred of homophilia. But it's not because God is encouraging us – it's because we are trying to protect God!
Think for a moment. Who hates the English language most? Quebeckers, yes. And why? Because English is destroying their language, endangering its very survival in Canada. Every new anglicism (le weekend, le wifi, etc) strikes a blow against what they passionately defend – their beloved French.
It's the same for us. Homophilia is busily dividing and destroying some of the biggest churches in the world, churches which have nurtured and protected God's followers for centuries. It is distorting the very words we use (like “marriage”), confusing Christians, and bringing massive discredit on God's name. THAT'S what stirs up the hatred!
* * * *
Before you shoot me, please note one thing. I do not condone this hatred. Christ teaches us to love, not hate. When you dismiss my opinions as irrational, I must turn the other cheek, not hate you. If God's kingdom is threatened by homophilia, HE will defend it – I must not adopt desperate measures, but wait for Him to act and revive His church.
I admit that I'm tempted to hate homophiles, these “sympathetic” straights – but I really am trying not to! They are no more sinful than I.
Hey listen, you are ALL welcome to come to church with us. We're following Jesus, having enormous fun, and learning about lots of things more important than sex.